If your life was a book, what would you call the next chapter?
I'm a dreamer. I wanted to be an explorer when I was a child, well until the age of seventeen, in fact, when the career guidance teacher at my school tried to convince me that (a) there wasn't much left to explore in this world - and to which I argued that what still needs to be discovered, was still unknown- and (b) you really couldn’t consider this a career. She shattered my dream of spending my future travelling, searching for new places and cultures, underlining that you needed a lot of money to live such a vain and unproductive life and perhaps I could just "grow up", find a serious interest to specialise in, go to university and pursue a career. What interests you besides the idea of exploring? She asked with a touch of sarcasm. Oh, I like so many things, I replied, I would like to learn other languages, study psychology, I like poetry, I love writing - maybe I could try journalism, or I could do African studies, that would be fascinating ... Wait, wait, wait ... she said, You can't do all that! You have to focus on one thing and move in that direction: how about following the idea of psychology? You will you probably get enough points to be accepted in Trinity. Let's try that.
I came out of that office with a bitter taste in my mouth.
I was lucky to see a therapist, not long after, only once, but he made all the difference. I was a tormented teenager and angry with the world, so, for several reasons it was decided that it was a good idea for me to see a psychologist. It was an experience that really illuminated my dark soul. I told him I had applied for psychology at university, Great, he replied, And what are the things you hope to do in your life?
I immediately liked the use of the plural and I emptied my heart dreams and wishes... I want to make a difference in the world somehow, I said, I would like to do something that helps, but I don't know what, there are so many things and I feel so lost ... With a big smile and shining eyes he told me to never stop on one thing, that life was constantly changing and that it was wonderful that I wanted to do so many things: Do them all! Start with something, but remember that you can always change course. Do everything you do with passion. You will be able to make a difference only if you believe in yourself.
So where am I now in this book? I feel I’m about to start a new chapter. I am in a space where my actions and decisions are less impulsive and more cautious than when I was seventeen, but I know I have options. Always. I know that whatever I do or say or feel is a consequence of a decision I made, for better and for worse. That no matter what there is always something to learn: something that will give you the key to the next door. And with every change, the intrepid fear of the darkness of the unknown and the incredible adrenaline of What next? Here I come!